The Iowa Supreme Court and one "irristible" dental assistant

In case you missed it under the news of George Zimmerman's trial and the Asiana plan crash, the upheld it's previous ruling that it was lawful for a man to fire his dental assistant for being "irresistible." The woman in question, Melissa Nelson, was a dental assistant who has the misfortune of being attractive to her boss. The court found that Melissa Nelson's termination did not amount to discrimination, and that it was over a matter of a personal relationship, and not gender bias.

The Sacramento Bee sums it up nicely: "The all-male court found that bosses can fire employees they see as threats to their marriages, even if the subordinates have not engaged in flirtatious or other inappropriate behavior. The court said such firings do not count as illegal sex discrimination because they are motivated by feelings, not gender."

My problem with this is that the whole premise for his decision to fire her - and the court's ruling of upholding it - boils down to the idea that you're around someone who you're attracted to, you inevitable will compromise your work marriage by having sexual relations with that person. Basically, men are incapable of keeping it in their pants.

This is one of those situations that, if unpacked enough, serves as a great example of how sexism hurts both men and women. It's pretty obvious how it hurt the woman involved: she engaged in a power struggle with a man who held a lot of power over her, and lost. Further, the Iowa Supreme Court has now confirmed that she can be lawfully fired for simply existing as a (beautiful to some) woman in a world (and place of employment) run by men. Men who are so enslaved to their base desires that they cannot have successful dental practices or marriages if there is a beautiful woman around. At least, that's the message this legal ruling is sending. It's the whole "men can't help but be rapists" idea wrapped up in different paper. The only difference is, that idea is simply propagated by rape culture (victim blaming, slut-shaming, etc.) and this is now encapsulated in a legal ruling. It's hard to figure out which is worse.

This is another reason why we have work to do with how we treat our men, too. Men deserve the respect of not being treated as base, physical beings by default. See this amazing piece from The Good Men Project for an enlightening read on the dangers of demonizing male sexuality. We need to send the message that men are not de facto rapists; that men have control and will power and morals; that they have the ability to think with more than just the thing between their legs. Rulings like this are what happens in a culture that promotes the idea that men simply can't stop themselves. We all know that's not true; now let's show it in our actions and words.