Kasandra Perkins: Murder first, tragedy second.

photo: nydailynews

Yes, the fact that Jovan Belcher killed Kasandra Perkins and then himself is tragic. By all means, a true tragedy. But as I read, I can’t help but notice that the way the media is reporting on the whole thing is a really astounding example of normalizing violence against women and using females as mere throw away characters in the story of a male-centered world.

This is all based off of various articles from cnn.com, my daily home base for getting informed about what’s going on in the world before leaving the house. Usually I love them, right down to easily naviagable homepage to their not-news news about Kate Middleton's morning sickness disease to dating over 40. Not so today.

So far, I’ve seen one picture of the girlfriend and mother, Kasandra Perkins. Just one, among the dozens and dozens of Jovan Belcher stretching before a game, taking down a running back, and squirting water on his face during a really hot practice.
This link, which this morning was the main, overview article from cnn.com, has 12 such pictures in a set of 16; the other four include the team at their game on Sunday, flags outside the stadium, some fans, and the house he shared with Kasandra Perkins.

Okay. So I guess they just couldn’t squeeze in a picture of her between all the pictures of football players doing their thing. But after you get past the pictures, you see that the article doesn’t even mention her by name until the 6th paragraph, and only then as a small piece of the plotline that leads up to Belcher killing himself.

Before that, the three references of her call her “his girlfriend,” “the woman he killed,” and “a younger woman," restricting her identity to how she related to the life of a man.
The article continues to give an in-depth description of how he got noticed as a football player, his time at the University of Maine, his entry into the NFL, and the controversy over the decision to go forward with the Cheif's game a mere few day later. Their child is only mentioned as “the baby” and the article describes how when he killed himself, he left her “without a parent.”

Well no shit, cnn. The poor baby is parent-less because he murdered her mother.  Not just because he killed himself. But the way you report it, it's like she got tragically sucked up by a tornado and then he killed himself.


Let me remind you right now that I'm not downplaying the horrific nature of this violence, but rather the horrific sexism of the reporting.

What’s with all the euphemism about this “tragedy” and passive
language? Why is there not equal attention to his murder of Kasandra Perkins and his suicide? And how about giving her a name, a voice, a humanity? She was a mother and a partner, she had her own set of stats that reflect her life. Just because she wasn't a football player doesn't mean she should be completely ignored, cast aside as a minor character who was the "victim of a tragedy" in a much larger, more interesting male-dominated story.

And they're all like this. Just check out this article, or this one, or this one.

Let's move onto the effects of this kind of language and general down-playing: violence against women is both trivialized and normalized. Not only is there no discussion about the huge issue of domestic violence in America, but the reporters in these particular articles add insult to injury by linking up a story about a helpline for current and formal NFL players. Yes, because the problem of disturbed current and former NFL players is a HUGE problem in America, and something must be done about it. There's also been vigorously renewed discussion about mental health issues and about gun control. Which is great. Two issues that matter a lot.

But where is the helpline for women who fear a similar outcome from their own relationship? Where is the vigorous discussion about how prevalent violence against women is America, and how every year, 1,500 women are murdered by their partners? Let me tell you, it’s not there. Because violence against women is extremely normal in this country, and suicidal football players aren’t. And we live in a male-centered world, so naturally the focus of this story is on the man (not only a
man but a highly successful football player). Yes, he did the shooting, but two people are dead. Why is one getting 99% of the media’s attention? Why do we barely see her name, or know anything about her? Why isn't there a discussion about how common partner violence against women is?

This is an action-oriented blog, and today the action offered is a little more nebulous, but it's important all the same:

- Tell things like they are. He murdered her. The main article says that “he ended his girlfriend’s life before ending his own.” No. Take it from this Engish/Linguistics major, this sort of language works its way to the back of your mind and says "see, it isn't really that bad." But it is. He didn't merely "end her life" or “take it away” or “kill the mother of his child.” He shot an innocent, defenceless woman at point-blank range; it was cold-blooded murder. We often make hard things easier to swallow when it comes to women: rape becomes “sexual assault” and a man beating the crap out of his wife become “domestic abuse.” There’s a similar thing going on with the coverage of Jovan Belcher’s acts. Euphemistic language only serves to minimize the act and normalize what he did. Try to avoid it.

- Ask about who she was. Post on comment sections of articles, talk to your friends and co-workers, and comment on the fact that moment of silence on Sunday’s game was for the victims of domestic violence and their families, not for the suicidal player, which is one of the most redeeming acts of this whole terrible thing. Let the media and people around you know that you’re interested in her too.

Make her part of your dialogue. Ask people: what did Kasandra Perkins do for a living? What was her baby named? Where did she go to school, how did she start her career, what are some of the highlights of herlife? Belcher gets pages of pictures and text giving the readers a glimpse into in humanity so that we can feel the fullness of his death more fully. Doesn't she deserve the same respect? She was a living, breathing person  who took care of a three-month-old baby everyday and did not get to have a choice in her death like her mentally-anguished boyfriend. Suicide is the last symptom of deep mental issues, but in the end, Kasandra Perkins wound up the victim of someone else's anguish. She deserves an identity outside of the fact that her partner was a famous football player who murdered her. Try to give her one.